Letting go has never been my strong point…and there’s a tremendous amount of loss that comes with that territory.
But there’s also a tremendous amount of learning, growth, and expansion waiting on the other side of that. Change is constant, and if you try to deny and resist it, you’ll find yourself repeating the same cycles that keep you from moving forward.
Recognizing and working on the parts of yourself that need to heal and change can be messy….and uncomfortable….and hard.
And sometimes you come out a different person than you were before. And there will be people….people you love…. who treat you differently. You’ll be criticized. You’ll be misunderstood. And there will be relationships that will never be the same.
I’ve been learning this in the most painful way.
The thing is…. a lot of us say we’ll love and support our family and friends no matter who they are or what they do. And I believe everyone truly means that when they say it. The problem is….when shiz gets real and we actually have to do it…a lot of us don’t know how.
Everything that’s going on inside you looks different than what people have always known, and many feel scared, confused, and even threatened by that change. A lot of times as those scary, confusing, and threatening feelings surface, they’re processed and projected in the form of criticisms (obvious or subtle), judgements, dissatisfaction and condemning.
But here’s the thing…. It’s important to understand that the source of all those unpleasant reactions is FEAR.
Fear indicates that you really care about something.
These people love and care about you deeply….but fear often distorts the message of those loving and caring feelings and it’s translated into a number of any one of those unpleasant reactions above ⤴️
And that’s okay. Because consciously, we are all on different levels of understanding and growth. Everyone sees and processes the world with a different lens. You and I could have the exact same experience together, yet relate a completely different story when recalling that experience to someone else. We’re all on different frequencies, have unique dna, and thousands upon thousands of life’s experiences collected since the beginning of time tucked away in our subconscious mind that constructs our thoughts, ideas, beliefs, emotional awareness and overall perceptions.
Our paths are not going to be the same – and that’s okay! It’s not our job to make others feel like their way is wrong or bad…. it’s our job to love each other unconditionally, as Christ would.
I really believe people are inherently good, and that we all have different means of coming into that goodness, finding our light, and sharing it with the world around us. Some people have always had a strong sense of their light and self and don’t have to journey through much to get to that place. Others have had very little understanding of self and their light and have to go through the darkest parts of themselves in order to find and really come to know their light.
And then there’s some people who never find it.
I believe there will be less and less people in that last category ⤴️ as we consciously spread our own light and love. And we are only able to love the people around us as well as we love ourselves. If we’re constantly criticizing, shaming, judging, comparing, and demeaning ourselves – and we do it in subtle, sneaky ways – that will manifest in how we love and treat the people around us.
I’ve made a lot of mistakes. I’ve made choices I’m not proud of, and, unfortunately…. I’ve deeply hurt people close to me. Experiences like that can break a person. They have the capacity to keep individuals in shame, suffering, and darkness….or they can hold the space for refinement, learning, growth, and healing. The latter is the path I’ve chosen to take, and it’s the one I hope everyone chooses to take if they find themselves where I did.
The path I’m taking doesn’t look like what I thought it would….and I know it doesn’t look like what many people think it should look like. And again, that’s okay. The way you go through your process is going to be different and unique to you, and, in my opinion, the path you take isn’t as important as long as it ultimately leads us to the same destination, which is; A greater love for and understanding of yourself, of God, and everyone around you.
A greater love and understanding. More compassion. More patience. More peace. More tolerance (remember, tolerance doesn’t mean acceptance!), and most of all, more love, harmony, and respect for all of humanity.
I am FAR from perfect. Obviously 😂 I’m still learning, growing, changing out old thought patterns, and
making mistakes creating more learning experiences along the way. But I know my path has a purpose, and I feel more in alignment with that purpose everyday. I will continue to do what brings me the most peace, love, light, and compassion into my life, and I hope all of you will do the same. Whether that’s staying on your current path, redirecting yourself a little, or completely changing course. You’ll know. Trust yourself, and God, to know what’s best for you (maybe there’s nothing you need to change!), and respect the people around you who are doing the same….even (and especially) when their journey looks different than yours.